Knowledge25

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Aksar Phasta Hai

Interviews Ke Sawaal Mae

Badi Companiyon Ki Chaal Mae

Boss Aur Client Ke Bawaal Mae

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pak Gaya Hai

Meetings Ki Jhelai Mae

Submissions Ki Gehrai Mae

Teamwork Ki Chatai Mae

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Laga Rahta Hai

Schedule Ko Failane Mae

Targets Ko Khiskaane Mae

Roz Naye-Naye Bahane Mae

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo

Lunch Time Mae Breakfast Karta Hai

Dinner Time Mae Lunch Karta Hai

Commutation Ke Waqt Soya Karta Hai

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Pagal Hai

Chai Aur Samose Ke Pyar Mae

Cigeratte Ke Khumar Mae

Birdwatching Ke Vichar Mae

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Khoya Hai

Reminders Ke Jawaab Mae

Na Milne Wale Hisaab Mae

Behtar Bhavishya Ke Khwaab Mae

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jise Intezaar Hai

Weekend Night Manane Ka

Boss Ke Chhutti Jaane Ka

Increment Ki Khabar Aane Ka

 

Engineer Woh Hai Jo Sochta Hai

Kaash Padhai Pe Dhyaan Diya Hota

Kaash Teacher Se Panga Na Liya Hota

Kaash Ishq Na Kiya Hota

 

Aur Sabse Behtar To Ye Hota

Kambakht Engineering Hi Na Kiya Hota............

Knowledge10

1.           A cow standing on the road keeps shouting 'F'... 'F'...

Why???



































Because F=ma ( Newton 's Second Law :) )

 

 

 

 

2. A boy throws a bottle of Bournvita out of the window. A cat sees it, and takes the bottle of bournvita and buries it under the ground. Why?











































Because 'CAT-BURIES' Bournvita

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. Who is called female Java?







































Java'Gal' Srinath

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. 3 cockroaches are walking on the road. Suddenly 1 of them starts singing 'Tujhe Dekha To Yeh Jaana Sanam...' And the other 2 die immediately. Why?







































Because it was a HIT song.

 

"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take; but by the moments that take our breath away...."

 

Knowledge19

----

VERY IMPORTANT WARNING

 

 

 

     Please Be Extremely Careful especially if using internet mail such as

Yahoo, Hotmail, AOL and so on. This information arrived this morning direct

          from both Microsoft and Norton.

Please send it to everybody you know who has access to the Internet.

          You may receive an apparently harmless email with a P ower Point

          presentation "Life is beautiful."

If you receive it DO NOT OPEN THE FILE UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, and delete

     it immediately. If you open this file, a message will appear on your screen

     saying: "It is too late now, your life is no longer beautiful."

Subsequently you will LOSE EVERYTHING IN YOUR PC and the person who sent it

     to you will gain access to your name, e-mail and password.

     This is a new virus which started to circulate on Saturday afternoon. AOL

     has already confirmed the severity, and the antivirus software's are not

capable of destroying it. The virus has been created by a hacker who calls

     himself "life owner."

    

 

 

PLEASE SEND A COPY OF THIS EMAIL TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS and ask them to PASS

                             IT ON IMMEDIATELY

 

Knowledge6

 

Hi all

 

 

The numbers we all use (1, 2, 3, 4, etc.) are known as "arabic" numbers to distinguish them from the " Roman Numerals" (I, II, III, IV, V, VI, etc). Actually the arabs popularized these numbers but they were originally used by the early phonecian traders to count and keep track of their trading accounts.

Have you ever thought why ........ 1 means "one", and 2 means "two"? The roman numerals are easy to understand but what was the logic behind the phonecian numbers?

---

It's all about angles !

It's the number of angles. If one writes the numbers down (see below) on a piece of paper in their older forms, one quickly sees why. I have marked the angles with "o"s.

No 1 has one angle.
No 2 has two angles.
No 3 has three angles.
etc.

and "O" has no angles

 

 

Knowledge24

 

Main Kaidi(PRISONER) No 1234

Cubicle ke dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon
apni hi tarah
khaali baithe ek colleague ko dekhta hoon
kabhi mail karta
kabhi coffee peeta
kabhi Extn pe baat karta
Messenger pe chat karta rehta
woh kehte hain woh TL hai
woh kehte hain woh senior hai
fir kyon mere jaisa lagta hai
kyon din bhar FW: padhta hai

cubicle ki dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon
cabin me baithe apne PM ko dekhta hoon
Main kaidi no 1234
kabhi phone pe
kabhi conference-call pe
gussa utarta jaane kis pe
who kehte hain project aane wala hai
training complete karo , kaam aane wala hai
fir kyon mujhe yeh jhootha sa lagta hai
fir kyon yeh sapna sa lagta hai

Main kaidi no 1234
cubicle ke dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon
Doosri companiyon ko join kar chuke
purane doston ko dekhta hoon
woh kehte hain bond ka kya hai, chale jao
woh kehte hain kahin aur kismat aazmao
fir kyon bond todne se dil darta hai
abhi do saal aur intezaar
karne ko jee darta hai

Main kaidi no 1234.....
cubicle ki dewaron ke us paar dekhta hoon.............
roz ek nayi subah ka intazaar karta hu
dewaron ke us paar dekhta hu...........

 

 

Knowledge30

The following is the philosophy of Charles Schultz, the creator of the "Peanuts" comic strip. You don't have to actually answer the questions. Just read the e-mail straight through, and you'll get the point.

 

1. Name the five wealthiest people in the world.

 

2. Name the last five Heisman trophy winners.

 

3. Name the last five winners of the Miss America.

 

4. Name ten people who have won the Nobel or Pulitzer Prize.

 

5. Name the last half dozen Academy Award winner for best actor and actress.

 

6. Name the last decade's worth of World Series winners.

How did you do?

 

The point is, none of us remember the headliners of yesterday. These are no second-rate achievers. They are the best in their fields. But the applause dies. Awards tarnish. Achievements are forgotten. Accolades and certificates are buried with their owners .

Here's another quiz. See how you do on this one:

 

1. List a few teachers who aided your journey through school.

 

2. Name three friends who have helped you through a difficult time.

 

3. Name five people who have taught you something worthwhile.

 

4. Think of a few people who have made you feel appreciated and special.

 

5. Think of five people you enjoy spending time with.

Easier?

The lesson: The people who make a difference in your life are not the ones with the most credentials, the most money, or the most awards. They are the ones that care .

 

 

Knowledge29

It's half past 8 in the office but the lights are still on...
PCs still running, coffee machines still buzzing...

and who's at work?

Most of them??? Take a closer look...
All or most specimens are ??-something male species of the human
race...

Look closer... again all or most of them are bachelors...
and why are they sitting late? Working hard? No way!!!

Any guesses???
Let's ask one of them...

Here's what he says... "What's there 2 do after going home... here we et to surf, AC, phone, food, coffee.. that is why I am working late...importantly no bossssssss!!!!!!!!!!!

This is the scene in most research centers and software companies and ther off-shore offices.

Bachelors "time-passing" during late hours in the office just bcoz they way they've nothing else to do...

Now what r the consequences... read on...
"Working"(for the record only) late hours soon becomes part of the
institute or company culture.

With bosses more than eager to provide support to those "working" late in the form of taxi vouchers, food vouchers and of course good
feedback,(oh, he's a hard worker... goes home only to change..!!).

 

They aren't helping things too... To hell with bosses who don't understand the difference between "sitting" late and "working" late!!!

Very soon, the boss start expecting all employees to put in extra working hours.

So, My dear Bachelors let me tell you, life changes when u get married and start having a family... office is no longer a priority, family  is... and that's when the problem starts... becoz u start having commitments at home too.

For your boss, the earlier "hardworking" guy suddenly seems to become a "early leaver" even if u leave an hour after regular time... after doing the same amount of work.

People leaving on time after doing their tasks for the day are labeled as work-shirkers...

Girls who thankfully always (its changing nowadays... though) leave on time are labeled as "not up to it". All the while, the bachelors pat their own backs and carry on "working" not realizing that they r spoiling the work culture at their own place and never realize that
they wuld have to regret at one point of time.
 

So what's the moral of the story??
* Very clear, LEAVE ON TIME!!!
* Never put in extra time " *unless really needed *"
* Don't stay back un-necessarily and spoil your company work culture which will in turn cause inconvenience to you and your colleagues.

There are hundred other things to do in the evening..
Learn music...
Learn a foreign language...
Try a sport... TT, cricket.........
Importantly Get a girl friend or gal friend, take him/her around
town...

* And for heaven's sake net cafe rates have dropped to an all-time low
(plus, no fire-walls) and try cooking for a change.
Take a tip from the Smirnoff ad: *"Life's calling, where are you??"*

ITS A TYPICAL INDIAN MENTALITY THAT WORKING FOR LONG HOURS MEANS VERY HARD WORKING & 100% COMMITMENT ETC.

PEOPLE WHO REGULARLY SIT LATE IN THE OFFICE DONT KNOW TO MANAGE THEIR TIME. SIMPLE

 

Knowledge18

 

Must read story.

There was a contest to write a fictional story for 500 words max which would start with the line “On a dark and foggy night, a small figure lay huddled on the railway tracks leading to the Chennai station "

This is what a guy wrote for the contest....... and surprisingly, it was adjudged the best short story:

On a dark and foggy night, a small figure lay huddled on the railway tracks leading to the Chennai station. At once I was held back to see someone in that position during midnight with no one around. With curiosity taking the front seat, I went near the body and tried to investigate it. There was blood all over the body which was lying face down. It seemed that a ruthless blow by the last train could have caused the end of this body which seemed to be that of a guy of around my age. Amidst the gory blood flow, I could see a folded white envelope which was fluttering in the midnight wind. Carefully I took the blood stained envelope and was surprised to see the phrase "Appraisal Letter" on it. With curiosity rising every moment, I wasted no time in opening the envelope to see if I can find some details about the dead guy. The tag around the body's neck and the jazzy appraisal cover gave me the hint that he might be a software engineer. I opened the envelope to find a shining paper on which the appraisal details where typed in flying colors. Thunders broke into my ears and lightening struck my heart when I saw the appraisal amount of the dead guy!!!!! My God, it was not even, as much as the cost of the letter on which the appraisal details were printed.... My heart poured out for the guy and huge calls were heard inside my mind saying "no wonder, this guy died such a miserable death"...  As a fellow worker in the same industry, I thought I should mourn for him for the sake of respect and stood there with a heavy heart thinking of the shock that he would have experien! ced when his manager had placed the appraisal letter in his hand. I am sure his heart would have stopped and eyes would have gone blank for few seconds looking at the near to nothing increment in his salary.

While I mourned for him, for a second my hands froze to see the employee's name in the appraisal letter... hey, what a strange co-incidence, this guy's name is same as mine, including the initials. This was interesting.

With some mental strength, I turned the body upside down and found myself fainted for a second. The guy not only had my name, but also looked exactly like me. Same looks, same built, same name.... it was me who was dead there!!!!!!!! While I was lost in that shock, I felt someone patting on my shoulders. My heart stopped completely, I could not breathe and sprung in fear to see who was behind......... splash!!! Went the glass of water on my laptop screen as I came out of my wild dream to see my manager standing behind my chair patting on my shoulder saying, "wake up man? Come to meeting room number two. I have your appraisal letter ready".

 

 

Knowledge14

PHILOSOPHY  

Keep your office clean... Stay home!!!

Be quiet in the office… respect the fact that others sleep!

When you get this E MAIL, send it to 1 person U love, 1 U hate, 1 U always
Think of and 1 U wish to kill. Now, keep guessing why I sent it to U .

The IDEAL man does not smoke, does not drink, does not flirt, goes to bed
Early, in short ... Does not exist

Sometime my mind asks why I miss you? Why I care for you? Why I remember
You? Then my heart answers it's simply because mental patient needs more
Care.


And the final one…

Great people talk about ideas; average people talk about things, small
People talk about others… But   legends never talk, they send E MAIL.

 

Knowledge9

Here is some useful information for all.

Ctrl+C may be the most important work we do everyday. But it's not a very safe thing to do. Read on to know why. What happens when you press Ctrl+C while you are Online... We do copy various data by Ctrl + C for pasting elsewhere.


This copied data is stored in clipboard and is accessible from the net by a combination of Javascripts and ASP.


Just try this:


1) Copy any text by Ctrl + C
2) Click the Link: < http://www.sourcecodesworld.com/special/clipboard.asp >

3) You will see the text you copied was accessed by this web page.

Do not keep sensitive data (like passwords, credit card numbers, PIN etc.) in the clipboard while surfing the web. It is extremely easy to extract the text stored in the clipboard to steal your sensitive information. Forward this information to as many friends as you can, to save them from online frauds ! "

Interestingly, this hack works only on internet explorer, and not on Mozilla Firefox browser

Knowledge15

Very Useful commands ………………DON’T MESS AROUND WITH THEM !

 

 

 

To Access….			Run Command
Accessibility Controls			access.cpl
Accessibility Wizard			accwiz
Add Hardware Wizard			hdwwiz.cpl
Add/Remove Programs			appwiz.cpl
Administrative Tools			control admintools
Adobe Acrobat (if installed)			acrobat
Adobe Designer (if installed)			acrodist
Adobe Distiller (if installed)			acrodist
Adobe ImageReady (if installed)			imageready
Adobe Photoshop (if installed)			photoshop
Automatic Updates			wuaucpl.cpl
Bluetooth Transfer Wizard			fsquirt
Calculator			calc
Certificate Manager			certmgr.msc
Character Map			charmap
Check Disk Utility			chkdsk
Clipboard Viewer			clipbrd
Command Prompt			cmd
Component Services			dcomcnfg
Computer Management			compmgmt.msc
Control Panel			control
Date and Time Properties			timedate.cpl
DDE Shares			ddeshare
Device Manager			devmgmt.msc
Direct X Control Panel (If Installed)*			directx.cpl
Direct X Troubleshooter			dxdiag
Disk Cleanup Utility			cleanmgr
Disk Defragment			dfrg.msc
Disk Management			diskmgmt.msc
Disk Partition Manager			diskpart
Display Properties			control desktop
Display Properties			desk.cpl
Display Properties (w/Appearance Tab Preselected)			control color
Dr. Watson System Troubleshooting Utility			drwtsn32
Driver Verifier Utility			verifier
Event Viewer			eventvwr.msc
Files and Settings Transfer Tool			migwiz
File Signature Verification Tool			sigverif
Findfast			findfast.cpl
Firefox (if installed)			firefox
Folders Properties			control folders
Fonts			control fonts
Fonts Folder			fonts
Free Cell Card Game			freecell
Game Controllers			joy.cpl
Group Policy Editor (XP Prof)			gpedit.msc
Hearts Card Game			mshearts
Help and Support			helpctr
HyperTerminal			hypertrm
Iexpress Wizard			iexpress
Indexing Service			ciadv.msc
Internet Connection Wizard			icwconn1
Internet Explorer			iexplore
Internet Properties			inetcpl.cpl
Internet Setup Wizard			inetwiz
IP Configuration (Display Connection Configuration)			ipconfig /all
IP Configuration (Display DNS Cache Contents)			ipconfig /displaydns
IP Configuration (Delete DNS Cache Contents)			ipconfig /flushdns
IP Configuration (Release All Connections)			ipconfig /release
IP Configuration (Renew All Connections)			ipconfig /renew
IP Configuration (Refreshes DHCP & Re-Registers DNS)			ipconfig /registerdns
IP Configuration (Display DHCP Class ID)			ipconfig /showclassid
IP Configuration (Modifies DHCP Class ID)			ipconfig /setclassid
Java Control Panel (If Installed)			jpicpl32.cpl
Java Control Panel (If Installed)			javaws
Keyboard Properties			control keyboard
Local Security Settings			secpol.msc
Local Users and Groups			lusrmgr.msc
Logs You Out Of Windows			logoff
Malicious Software Removal Tool			mrt
Microsoft Access (if installed)			access.cpl
Microsoft Chat			winchat
Microsoft Excel (if installed)			excel
Microsoft Frontpage (if installed)			frontpg
Microsoft Movie Maker			moviemk
Microsoft Paint			mspaint
Microsoft Powerpoint (if installed)			powerpnt
Microsoft Word (if installed)			winword
Microsoft Syncronization Tool			mobsync
Minesweeper Game			winmine
Mouse Properties			control mouse
Mouse Properties			main.cpl
Nero (if installed)			nero
Netmeeting			conf
Network Connections			control netconnections
Network Connections			ncpa.cpl
Network Setup Wizard			netsetup.cpl
Notepad			notepad
Nview Desktop Manager (If Installed)			nvtuicpl.cpl
Object Packager			packager
ODBC Data Source Administrator			odbccp32.cpl
On Screen Keyboard			osk
Opens AC3 Filter (If Installed)			ac3filter.cpl
Outlook Express			msimn
Paint			pbrush
Password Properties			password.cpl
Performance Monitor			perfmon.msc
Performance Monitor			perfmon
Phone and Modem Options			telephon.cpl
Phone Dialer			dialer
Pinball Game			pinball
Power Configuration			powercfg.cpl
Printers and Faxes			control printers
Printers Folder			printers
Private Character Editor			eudcedit
Quicktime (If Installed)			QuickTime.cpl
Quicktime Player (if installed)			quicktimeplayer
Real Player (if installed)			realplay
Regional Settings			intl.cpl
Registry Editor			regedit
Registry Editor			regedit32
Remote Access Phonebook			rasphone
Remote Desktop			mstsc
Removable Storage			ntmsmgr.msc
Removable Storage Operator Requests			ntmsoprq.msc
Resultant Set of Policy (XP Prof)			rsop.msc
Scanners and Cameras			sticpl.cpl
Scheduled Tasks			control schedtasks
Security Center			wscui.cpl
Services			services.msc
Shared Folders			fsmgmt.msc
Shuts Down Windows			shutdown
Sounds and Audio			mmsys.cpl
Spider Solitare Card Game			spider
SQL Client Configuration			cliconfg
System Configuration Editor			sysedit
System Configuration Utility			msconfig
System File Checker Utility (Scan Immediately)			sfc /scannow
System File Checker Utility (Scan Once At Next Boot)			sfc /scanonce
System File Checker Utility (Scan On Every Boot)			sfc /scanboot
System File Checker Utility (Return to Default Setting)			sfc /revert
System File Checker Utility (Purge File Cache)			sfc /purgecache
System File Checker Utility (Set Cache Size to size x)			sfc /cachesize=x
System Information			msinfo32
System Properties			sysdm.cpl
Task Manager			taskmgr
TCP Tester			tcptest
Telnet Client			telnet
Tweak UI (if installed)			tweakui
User Account Management			nusrmgr.cpl
Utility Manager			utilman
Windows Address Book			wab
Windows Address Book Import Utility			wabmig
Windows Backup Utility (if installed)			ntbackup
Windows Explorer			explorer
Windows Firewall			firewall.cpl
Windows Magnifier			magnify
Windows Management Infrastructure			wmimgmt.msc
Windows Media Player			wmplayer
Windows Messenger			msmsgs
Windows Picture Import Wizard (need camera connected)			wiaacmgr
Windows System Security Tool			syskey
Windows Update Launches			wupdmgr
Windows Version (to show which version of windows)			winver
Windows XP Tour Wizard			tourstart
Wordpad			write
.