Fun260

If the truth be told about wives......




I recently read that love is entirely a matter of
chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David
Bissonette


* When a man steals your wife, there is no better
revenge
than
to let him keep her.



* After marriage, husband and wife become two
sides of a
coin;
they just can't face each other, but still they stay
together. Hemant
Joshi

* By all means marry. If you get a good wife,
you'll be happy.
If
you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates

* Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents
us from
achieving them. Dumas

* The great question... which I have not been able
to answer...
is, "What does a woman want? Sigmund Freud

* I had some words with my wife, and she had some
paragraphs
with
me. Anonymous

* "Some people ask the secret of our long marriage.
We take
time
to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little
candlelight, dinner,
soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
Henry
Youngman


* "I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years."
Sam Kinison

* "There's a way of transferring funds that is even
faster than
electronic banking. It's called marriage." James Holt McGavran

* "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first
one left me
and the second one didn't." Patrick Murray

* Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming

1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,

2. Whenever you're right, shut up. Nash

* The most effective way to remember your wife's
birthday is to
forget it once... Anonymous

* You know what I did before I married? Anything I
wanted to.
Henny Youngman

* My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then
we met.
Rodney
Dangerfield

* A good wife always forgives her husband when
she's wrong.
Milton Berle

* Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with
the enemy.
Anonymous

* A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife
wanted".
Next
day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same
thing: "You
can have mine." Anonymous

* First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second
Guy "You're
lucky, mine's still alive."